Fights Over Spaghetti and the Last Clearance T-Shirt....Is This Who We Are?

This week two disturbing videos surfaced in my news feed. My heart was heavy after viewing the way young black women were portrayed and ultimately, the way they conducted themselves.

Here are the videos before I say my peace.

I don't even know how to describe my frustration. Wait....yes I do.

First let me say that I was not present at either altercation, and do not know any information other than what was displayed in the videos. Much of the commentary associated with the first video seemed to be in defense of the two young girls who were said to have been "provoked." I can see that. There was no visibly just cause for calling them animals for eating on a subway. Simply minding your own business would have prevented this situation. As someone who was verbally harassed and demeaned on a NYC subway, I understand the struggle to keep composure when pushed to the edge. I only really began to take issue with this video after I saw the second clip. There seemed to be an interesting theme, "black girls fighting=entertainment."

The girls on the subway were being harassed, yes. Any reasonable person would have been defensive, true. But what played out here, goes far beyond a mere subway scuffle, which is what made this video worthy of being but on YouTube, with over 100,000 views. It's the dynamic. Angry black women vs......whomever really. We can never get enough of that right? No one stepped in (until all hell broke loose) to mitigate the situation. Again, I say this as someone harassed on a train when again NO ONE offered so much as squeal of support. But sadly, it seems that's just the world we live in now. If it doesn't concern me, I'm keeping my mouth closed. Oh, but I will pull out this camera and have you caught out there on YouTube looking senseless. I will lend you a hand with that.

And this second video. Acting a H.A.M in a business establishment as though it were a scene from Fight Club. Punches thrown, merchandise vandalized, weaves flying every which-way. Is this who we are? I'll answer that... no! But this is how the world continues to see ALL OF US, as a result of the select few and that truly irks me. I don't say this looking down on these individuals because, again I was not there to witness the events that transpired leading up to the physical altercations, but I'm willing to bet it just wasn't that serious. And how can I blame these girls anyway. Is this not the same behavior we see aired weekly on Bad Girls Club? Basketball Wives? Jersey Shore....need I go on?

It seems that winning the title of "the baddest" reigns supreme over "the brightest," which is just stupid. I'm not sitting here waving my little judgmental finger over everyone. I had a hand in this as well. I watch these shows...well not Jersey Shore, but that's neither here nor there. Anyway, while I thought I was just being entertained, it seems we are being conditioned to believe this is the way women settle disputes. We name call, we demoralize, we humiliate, we fight. We just can't help but tear each other down and take pleasure in the presumed victory. I can just hear these girls now "yea, I beat that (insert words here), and its on YouTube!" No...please take a seat in the nearest super-glued chair. To use my very best English, this ain't winning.

But the reason these videos scored so many hits on YouTube is the same reason these deplorable television shows get the highest ratings...even over scripted programming. Why do we enjoy seeing women tear each other down?

There wouldn't be as much issue with these shows if they were the exception and not the rule. But there are far fewer positive portrayals of women on television, particularly women of color to combat these negative images. As a result, life imitates, well if I can even call it art.

And with bystanders so willing to pull out a camera phone to make some quick cash from worldstarhiphop, it won't be long before the next aspiring Bad Girls Club castmember auditions via a YouTube street brawl.

I don't have a thought provoking question as I usually do to close this post.

It's actually more of a rant. But I like to hear your rantings as well, so please leave a comment.

Let's love each other ok? :-)

And I feel the need to make this disclaimer:

My feelings on these videos are far more complex and more in depth than what this blog post can explain. I've been a black woman for a long time so I can't possibly sum up the whole of my feelings in a few minutes. But it's enough to get a conversation going...so talk to me!